Hear from our staff

An honest and unedited experience from Dr Arani

In mid June 2024 I met a young woman in neurology outpatient clinic for the first time. She attended clinic with her brother's partner and explained immediately that she had difficulties with reading and writing. I reassured her that I would explain things and encouraged her to ask me anything that she did not understand.

I spent a long time taking a thorough note of all the issues that she had currently as well as what had happened in the past. I was very sorry to hear that she had been a victim of domestic violence in the past. I examined her and then explained my thoughts on the diagnosis. She had seen a neurologist in the past but although I concurred with the diagnosis documented previously and explained that diagnosis to her, she perceived that the diagnosis was different and I was changing the diagnosis. 

She started shouting and became very aggressive. I had to go out of the room to ask one of the healthcare assistants to help support me and wondered whether I needed to call security because of the verbal abuse. When I returned to the room, she threatened me with the fact that she had recorded the whole consultation on her phone from the beginning (patients in the past have asked permission to record consultations and I have granted this as a lot of patients have difficulties with memory and taking in information).

I have reflected on this consultation a lot. A lot of patients unfortunately have significant stressors at home and social circumstances but thankfully it is extremely unusual for them to take out their frustrations on healthcare staff. Despite trying to keep calm and answering the patient's questions, I felt that the patient was abusive and aggressive.

I consider the purpose of our job to be - to make an accurate diagnosis and then discuss an appropriate management plan with the patient's thoughts and considerations taken into account. We have 30-minute appointment slots for new patients and 15 minutes for follow-ups and with the complexity of cases, this is sometimes inadequate. Despite spending over 30 minutes with this patient, I was not successful in helping her. I always feel sad when I feel I have not helped my patients.  When they are aggressive / abusive, it makes me feel a lot worse.

In the past, some patients have taken themselves out of the room when they have been upset and returned when calmer. I understand the difficulties that patients face, having been on the other side of the table with family. However I hope that patients understand that respect and kindness is a two-way street.

With respect to this case, I hope that with time, the patient will understand that I was trying to explain what I felt was the correct diagnosis and appropriate management plan.  And will eventually find a healthcare professional that she is able to communicate more easily with and eventually comes to terms with her diagnosis and her symptoms improve.

I will continue to reflect and change practice with each patient encounter.

An honest and unedited experience from Nina 

I was working as a receptionist in the Main Outpatients Department, when one of the patients started shouting as came in because there were so many people in the waiting room. Started saying there were too many 'blacks' here, that they get priority over white people. He pays his taxes so he should be seen first. That the last time he came here he saw a *** doctor and couldn’t understand a word they were saying. Look at the receptionist, they’re all bloody black. Coming here, taking all the jobs. He pointed at my colleague and said you probably can’t even speak English.  He then pointed at me and told me I can go back to where I come from, to which I responded ‘I’m from Wandsworth, that’s 2 buses.’  

I told him that due to his behaviour, no one on the reception desk was going to check him in.  There was around 40 patients in the waiting room plus nursing staff, no one said anything or supported any of us on the desk. The matron took the patient into a side room and then came and asked if we could check him in. I didn't report his behaviour because I was new and I wasn’t aware of who I could report this to. 

I was surprised by his comments, given that it’s a multicultural area. However, i t did not affect me in the slightest, I have always been thick skinned due to growing up in a multicultural household. 

I think it’s very important to share as it clearly shows that despite their being nearly 50 people in the room, no one but me said anything to this man. No one told him to stop. No one pulled him up on his behaviour. No one defended us.  

An honest and unedited experience  from Yvonne

The incident was when I was a junior staff nurse.  I was allocated to look after a patient who was critically unwell I had to do intense observations which meant I was on my feet all time – caring for her, doing blood transfusions; half hour observations as she was very sick. She was not aware of who was looking after her. At around 5am she started to recover and feel better, and she looked around and saw me, she shouted don’t touch me black b****  m*****, go back where you come from.  I had only been in the UK for three years and had not encountered racial abuse.  I did not know what to do, I was tired my feet were swollen. I gave my all to look after this patient and all I got was insults, monkey, and go back to where you came from. 

I was so emotional because I had given my all and had really looked after the patient, and she had recovered, and in return I was abused. I started to sob this did not make her stop even though I was sobbing she kept on going at it.  The nurse in charge came to tell her to stop and the patient did not stop and so I was asked to sit in the nurse’s office, in there I could still hear her in the background saying that she did not want me near her.

Nurse in charge came and said I should move away from her and I was asked to sit in the nurse’s office. I was told to go back and look after the patient I was allocated to her a so had to go there and look after her. She physically tried to push me and saying I should not touch her.  

At that time not one told me to report the behaviour I did not know how too. The Sister of the ward was informed that I had been abused but the nurse in charge did not ask me what happened or how she could support me so I was left alone feeling bruised unhappy and feeling unappreciated and I questioned whether I was in the right country - because a nurse is a nurse – I questioned am I in the right place?  I spoke to some of my colleagues, and they said I have to be thick skinned.

After this incident I was a bit more cautious and I began to anticipate that it might happen again, it knocked my confidence, and it took a long time for me to be confident again. 

I feel that staff that can go through a similar experience and still are - and what is important is the aftercare - checking on the wellbeing of that individual and helping them to heal from the experience. It does scar you because someone has abused you and you think did I choose to be black and nobody had confronted and racially abused me before. It was difficult because it was the first time and it happened at work, and it did not seem that my other colleagues who were not black understood what I was going through.  To this day I still remember it - it is an experience that has never left me.